Waiting for Marty

( Disclaimer: My hubby actually has a heart of gold and is very dependable.)

Naturally at this time of year, people are used to waiting. Waiting for traffic, waiting in line to buy their Christmas  gifts, waiting for family to arrive for the holidays.

For the better part of my married life, I have been waiting for my husband.

I’m not waiting to meet him- I have one alright. I just have to wait. Let me explain…

When we were early in our marriage, he worked away, and came home every 2 weeks or so.

Waiting.

Over the better part of 34 years, there has been several household fix it jobs to do. Waiting.

We had a leak upstairs that filtered through to our family room, and even though it was patched up well enough, 8 years later I am waiting for him to get it painted. ( This is a major cost since the whole downstairs would have to be painted along with it) so more waiting.

I waited 10 years for him to get our front driveway paving stone finished, as near the road it was incomplete. He ran out of bricks. One day, the city was ripping up all the neighbourhood sidewalks and when they completed their work, he had them finish the patch job. ” See, that’s what I was waiting for!” he said smiling.

More than once, I have waited for him to come home for dinner. One time I finally called and he said, “Oh I’m in Vancouver. I thought I told you…” Another time,” Oh I left for an auction.” Or, “I left for Calgary, remember?”

Now, he isn’t trying to be rude. He is two things. A little thoughtless where reporting to me is concerned, but mostly, he is too social.

He knows EVERYONE in our city. He grew up here, does business here and is very outgoing, so conversation and time get away from him. As he explains, “People stop him everywhere just to chat and a part of doing business is relationship, so…”

I wonder if he has considered the relationship with his wife…

When my two younger sons were teens, and he called from a shop saying “I had a beer with Ernie-Get Mack or Noah to pick me up,” they would begin with “No!! Not, me-him!”, then proceed to throw the keys at one another, until I stepped in because they KNEW they would have to wait for him to finish his “chat” with his friend. Sometimes while waiting, more than an hour would go by and the shop is 10 minutes away.

I’d try to prepare my youngest for the inevitable.

“Tell him he has to hurry because you have to study.”

“Tell him you have rugby practice in a  few minutes.”

“Tell him anything you have to” but it rarely worked. Now my kids were doomed to the same fate-waiting.

I cannot tell you how many times I have been in the passenger seat of his truck, along with kids in the back, and we have all waited outside a machine shop, a car dealership,  a truck parts shop while he seemed oblivious to our growing annoyance and agitation. Case in point-yesterday we went out for a drive. Kids are now old enough and smart enough not to come along.

We drive out to a nearby town, as the sun is shining, we have our coffee and he wants to show me the truck yard where one of our sons works. Okay, I have  few minutes and it’s a lovely day….

Next thing I know, we are parked outside an ATCO trailer in the yard, and he has disappeared. Oh, as a reminder, I tell, him-“Don’t forget about me!” The subtext is…I know what you’re like and don’t want to wait long.”

He leaves, and I go about pulling out my phone, looking at pics of my grand -daughter, reading the news. Check Instagram, check mail, check my watch.

Outside the snow falls softly on a birch grove near the truck. I wish I had my camera.

I scan for wildlife. Nothing but sunlight , trucks in the yard, and me…waiting.

I decide to call him ( I have been inside these shops plenty a time and always end up looking like the nagging wife, and leave feeling a bit sheepish as my husband sets out to playfully embarrass me, so I prefer to call him from the comfort of the vehicle).

Hello? Did you remember that I’m out here waiting?

“Okay, guess, it’s time to go.”

“Yes, thank you.”

10 minutes go by.

Now, my one phone call is decidedly used up so I make the decision to text him.

outside. waiting. Come now pls.    

No response.

Can u come now???????

Then I get the brilliant idea to just take the truck and leave him here!  Brilliant!…Except that I didn’t pay attention to exactly where we were and it is -30 outside….Darn!

My next desperate idea comes swiftly. I’m going to repeatedly text him until HE gets annoyed. I know that his phone is ON so….

Come!

Out!

NOW!

NOW!!!!!!!!!!

NOT TOMORROW!!!!

TODAY!!!!

As in NOW!!!!!!!!!!!

I start laughing to myself, mostly at how brilliant I am at solving problems and sure enough…Here he comes out the door, but has the audacity to don a quizzical and slightly annoyed look on his face! As if to say…What’s your problem?

Are you kidding me?

 

..

4 thoughts on “Waiting for Marty

  1. What a good laugh. I can relate to it all as he would come to our place and do the same thing to you and I would be after him to go home as you were going out. Guess he will never change but if he did he wouldn’t be who he is. Linda

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s